Happily Ever After?

Happily Ever After?

Happily Ever After?

Pastor Brian Saylor

What is a couple’s job description?

  • Role of couple is to Leave
  • Responsibility is to Cleave


What is a Husband’s job description?

Husbands love your wives like Christ loved the church, Eph 5:25

You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7

§  Role of Husband is to Lead by example

  • Responsibility of Husband is to Love
  • Greatest challenge:

Overcome laziness in spiritual leadership and unconditional love, Gen 3:11 – 12 Adam’s story


What is unconditional love? Loving with no expectations. Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 1 Corinthians 13:4,7

  •  Greatest need of his wife:

Affection – Love to a woman looks like “Gentleness and tenderness”

A woman wants a real man, men are initiators and women are responders! That is the way God designed it! Husband, be a spiritual leader and an unconditional lover of your wife and you will transform your marriage!


  • Greatest example:

1 Timothy 3:1-13; Titus 2:1-2, 6-8, 3:1-2, 9-11


What is a Wife’s job description?

Wives submit to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church, Eph 5:22, 23

Why does verse 22 come before 25, if the husband has the greater responsibility?

Even if the husband is Jesus to the wife, if she is not submitted there will be no harmony.

  • Role of wife is Helper
  • Responsibility of wife is to be Respectful
  • Greatest challenge:

Overcome temptation to control (& nag), Gen 3:16

Eve’s story

What is submission? It is an “ unselfish” attitude of the heart and a matter of the will exercised as obedience to the Lord. For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps, WHO COMMITTED NO SIN, NOR WAS ANY DECEIT FOUND IN HIS MOUTH; and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously; 1 Peter 2:21-23

 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 1 Peter 3:1,2

 hen a woman submits, she needs to know that it is not to ensure her happiness, but rather it is to obey her Lord. I know that it is hard…but I also know that it is possible, needful and blessed. If you are struggling with submission, take your confusion, your struggle before the Lord and tell Him that, by His grace, you will carry out to completion that which He is working in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure (Phil 2:12-13)

Husbands, if you see that your wife is having a struggle with submission to you, you need to look carefully at your role as a husband. It is not your job to make her submit; it is your responsibility to create within her a loving trust that leads to submission!


How far does submission go? As far as your wife’s conscience and God’s Word. Acts 5:28-29.


  • Greatest need of her husband:

Respect – Love to a man looks like “Follow the leader”


Wife if you begin trusting and respecting your husband you will transform your marriage! Great books: “Why Should I be the first to Change” “Beloved Unbeliever” “Creative Counterpart” “The Power of a Praying Wife”


  • Greatest example:

Proverbs 31:10-31

To sum up, let all be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil, or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3:8,9

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